Friday, February 8, 2008

An Emotional Week

Hi All.  It's been an emotional roller-coaster of a week here in Jerusalem, for a lot of different reasons.  I think I've cried, laughed, been angry and mean, been anxious and afraid, been calm and peaceful, and even more, all within the last 5 days.  Sometimes a week is just like that, though I think feelings seem to intensify living in a place like Jerusalem and being a part of a group of people like the HUC students.  

The week started off with a terribly sad announcement from my friend, rabbinical student colleague, and personal trainer, Dave.  For reasons I don't feel comfortable writing on here, he and his beautiful family are leaving Jerusalem to return to San Francisco on Tuesday.  I am heartbroken by this, for several different reasons, and it has been bothering me a lot more than I care to show or admit.  I know he is making the right decision for himself and his family, but I can't help thinking about what a shame it is, and how sad it will be, to send him home.  Please keep my friend Dave and his family in your thoughts and prayers--they need them more than I could ever describe on this blog.

Then, later that same day, I got up from my desk at home, tripped over my computer chord, and sent myself AND my brand-new computer crashing to the ground.  I have a large bruise on my left leg, and my computer is pretty much dead.  From what Adam was saying, it sounds like I need a new hard-drive, which means I have lost all of my music, papers, and pictures from this year.  It is also incredibly expensive to get computer parts in this country, and equally expensive to ship my computer back to the States, so it puts me in a terrible financial crunch.  It also means that I will not have many of the pictures (though, thank goodness for Facebook, which has allowed me to upload many of them onto the internet) that I took this year.  Go figure.  When I told my mom about this on Tuesday, she said that she was glad my computer was hurt and I wasn't; I jokingly replied that I wish I would have been hurt instead of my computer.  Health insurance pays for broken bones--it won't pay for a new hard-drive :(

Anyways, on the more positive side, Cantor Bruce Ruben, the head of the School of Sacred Music on the NYC campus, along with Cantor Josee Wolff, who is in charge of job placement for cantorial students, have both been on campus this week.  We've had a week full of meetings, dinners, interviews, and a special recording that was made this morning which is sent to potential employers for next year.  It's been stressful and busy, but also wonderful to get to know Bruce and Josee.  They are great people, who genuinely care about us (Bruce himself offered me his own Tylenol yesterday, after noticing that I wasn't feeling well--it was so nice of him.)  We've been discussing what the next 4 years of school will be like, and it's a little overwhelming to think about.  I will have a full schedule of classes AND a job at a congregation where I will be a cantor for real; it's a little intimidating and I am a bit afraid of how I will handle it all, but I'm also very, very excited.   I love being on the bimah and singing Jewish music, and I can't wait to have the opportunity to do so in a congregation and be seen as THE cantor.  Pretty cool!

Anyways, a million other things have happened since my last post, but I am totally wiped out and ready for a Friday afternoon nap.  I have a quick meeting with Erin and Steph about our service that is on February 18, and then I plan on taking the rest of my shabbat to hardcore CHILL OUT.  I was invited to dinner at Michelle's house, but I think I am going to stay home, rest and make some mean mushroom barley soup in lieu of joining her and my other friends.  I think some quality "me" time will be just what the doctor ordered, and I'm hoping I can get over this nasty cough/cold/sore throat thing that I've developed.   

I don't realize sometimes how incredibly lucky I am to live my dreams and to have a passion that I am inspired by and decided to follow.  Despite the obstacles of this year, despite illnesses and homesickness and all of the other millions of things I complain about, I am so fortunate and so lucky to be here.  

Shabbat shalom u'mevorach.

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